Pain...

Pain... 


Hurt...


Slashing through your heart. 
Everything different. 
From that single instant. 
You cannot move on.
You cannot let go. 
So much anger. 
The pain will not stop. 
It hurts so much.

Smile at your life. 
Look at all the good things. 
Once brought happiness. 
Once brought contentment. 
All those good things. 
Faded. 
Cheap. 
The hurt has tainted. 
The pain has marred.

How things have changed. 
Yet still the same. 
The good things you see. 
Nevertheless obscured. 
The pain is a thief.
Nothing out of place.

What do you do?
Where do you go?
Your heart is so broken.
Your mind cannot contain.
There seems no solution.
No end to this pain.

You don't think it will stop.
You need some relief. 
It was too important.
How do you go on?
You will always remember.
How can you cope?
You cannot forget.

Will there be healing?
Some consolation, 
For this slashing pain?
The continuing forward.
All is pretend.
The smile isn't real.

Could this be healed?
Never forgot.
Treasured forever.
Without the hurt stronger than ever.

Your pain has been shared.
Felt by another.
No longer alone.
Bearing this hurt.
The load is much easier.
Lighter to carry.



Never forgotten...


Treasured forever.

You are worth it!

Why do we say no to things we really want? What are we doing by denying ourselves something we want?

It is easy to say no to something you don’t like or that is painful or you just don’t feel like doing but what about that thing that we are longing for? Or the thing that feels so good right now? The thing that we weigh in our minds with every decision is ‘Is it worth it?’

Well think about how much you are worth? You are worth so much that the One that created you became human to redeem you. He made you in His Image and you are the apple of His eye. The question of ‘Is it worth it?’ takes on a whole new perspective in the light of what we -each and every one of us- are worth to our Creator.

This is so hard to remember in the heat of the moment, to treat yourself with the dignity, like a redeemed precious creation. Holding back may be in the end what is best but it certainly is not easy and not what I have always done.

Looking at our decisions in the light that you are the apple of the Creator's eye and the people that are involved in the decision are the apple of the Creator's eye. It places boundaries on how important what we want is, and what the outcome should be.

Just know that if you feel that it is degrading or denying that dignity that is created as part of you than know that you are worth it and it will be worth it to stay true to your worth.

You are treasured and you are are 

exquisite in the eyes of the One who made you.

You are Amazing

Are things just too much, like you can't do it all, like you are not enough?








I just want you to know. You CAN do this! You are capable! You are amazing! You ARE enough!
No matter what the struggle is I have seen you handle it with grace and poise and with the determination of a bird flying against a driving storm.
You have faced the unexpected, the unpredictable, and the unimaginable, and come out stronger, and more beautiful.
You have made tough decisions, and had difficult conversations, that have made you wiser.



Guess what? You don't have to do it all either and it's okay.
You are a wonderfully, talented and capable Mom/Sister/Friend/Daughter/Woman that has brightened my life by the incredible experiences that you have shared and you inspire me everyday.

Don't Ever Forget How Amazing You Are!!!!

Attitude

How incredibly fortunate we are. This statement has a lot of responses anyone could say 'fortunate...what are you talking about?' and yet someone else could look at that same person's life and say 'how could they ever be sad?'

I would never say that anyone's life is without struggles that are difficult to bear I just want to focus on how to cope, what to spend time thinking about, that changes a mood and changes behavior.

I have often struggled with obsessing over the things that make my life difficult and make me anxious. It has helped me to take those thoughts and deal with them and move on. For instance with my sister passing away I was unable to cope with the anxiety of her children being without a mother and finally one day I had to face this and ask God what to do and it was a process of healing that is still going on now. Some of the things that God showed me that helped me in this healing were hard to learn and I still am learning them 

But the most effective thing that has helped me through this struggle has been my attitude and perspective. Phil. 4:8 is a mainstay in my thinking and with God's help I try to apply it when my thoughts run toward difficult things, not that I don't deal with those difficult things but that I choose what I think about and I choose not to obsess.

Redemption

A baby born. A savior begotten. 

The Creator of the universe takes human form. 

This is what we celebrate. 

What did the 

Sovereign King do this for? 

Why would the Lord of everything want with becoming what he created?

You. Me. Human beings. So lost. So broken. Hateful, greedy and corrupt. So much hurt and pain. The 'Good' that had been created, ruined with distrust and disbelief.

His heart breaking over the separation caused.

The greatest love for His creation, this broken race. 

A way to redeem them from the pain that is our reality.

Redemption through His suffering. Spotless. Guiltless. Yet accused. All the hate, greed and corruption taken on by Him.

Finished.

This Christmas may this story of redemption touch you, may it bring peace and joy, and may His love fill your life.

Have you no Shame?

Shame... what is it? Guilt... Embarrassment... Fear... a boundary that has been crossed? I have for a long time reveled in the freedom and openness given to me through the cross, but is there a place for shame or embarrassment, dare I say modesty. I confess I rarely feel ashamed, or embarrassed, is that something I need to change? should I feel these things?

I think back to when I did get embarrassed or felt ashamed it was usually as I had done something wrong or someone else had wronged me, basically a boundary was crossed. For example when I was a young teen and a feminine hygiene product commercial came on or worse a male enhancement ad (this is still embarrassing in the wrong company) and I would have 'died' of embarrassment, 'How dare they show such personal stuff on TV?' I would think to myself. 'When did we decide that was not embarrassing anymore?' It may be that we just got used to it or that it really isn't that big of a deal.

The feeling of embarrassment is not a fun one but it does serve a purpose. It tells us that there are boundaries and we should think twice about crossing those boundaries, hence the feeling being an unpleasant one. Christ said 'love your neighbor as yourself' and as part of that we should respect others boundaries as if they were our own, not that we have to all have the same boundaries but that their needs and feelings of being violated are just as important as ours.

There comes a point when free through Christ's death and resurrection can become walking all over your 'neighbors' boundaries.

Free Will

What is free will? The RIGHT to choose? No one can do that for you, no one is responsible for your choice. Everyone knows whats best for everybody else. Lets take a minute to think about it. Who has to live with that choice? Who is the one responsible for the consequences?

There are times when another person's decision effects us or saddens us either because that decision hurts us or we see the hurt that is coming for them. The temptation is to pressure this person to do our will -we know whats best... right?- to prevent the hurt or inconvenience to them or us. To save everyone from the consequences.

There is great risk in honoring a person's free will, as some decisions have permanent and long term consequences like co-signing a loan, trying an addictive substance, getting a divorce or moving. God has taken that risk by giving each of us a free will. We can choose to seek him or we can choose not to. God has allowed this, and this CHOICE has great consequences(John 3:16).

If God has allowed this amount of risk with the apple of his eye (that's YOU!!). What would happen if we honored the way God has made us by communicating our concerns to the ones we love as God has done with the Gospel and then taking the risk to care for and love them as they make their own choices right, or wrong.





You might begin to find freedom in your relationships as God begins to works in their lives and they(not you!) begin to bear the weight of their decisions. That person begins to see the consequences of that decision good or bad and they learn how to choose better or what to do differently next time. We see this in nature with the butterfly struggling out of the cocoon without the struggle they do not gain the muscles required to fly and so are unable to gather food or avoid becoming prey to other bugs or animals. Likewise the seed falls to the ground and without the struggle of death just stays a seed(John 12:24). Without the struggles of life and sometimes death what do we learn from. Knowledge is all well and good but ultimately each and everyone of us at some point is thick headed and has to learn from the experience of consequences.

A change of heart is personal no one but God, the devil if he is allowed or the individual(usually only with God's help)can make that change in their life.

How can I show loving support to someone when they are making a choice that has long-term repercussions?

Start by getting on your knees and being a prayer warrior and if you have shared your concerns with them or don't feel that it is your place to share them, continue to be a prayer warrior and leave it in His ALMIGHTY hands.